Moaning and Pitching

I've just been asked to divulge my pet hates, to feature on my new bio page. It's intended to show the lighter side of our character and 'have a bit of fun'...

So I began to list my pet hates. I didn't realise I'd become so grumpy. I could write a book there are so many. Karl Pilkington has already done it, though.

So here's the edited highlights for your 'enjoyment'. Try and bear with me until the end…

My pet hates (In no particular order)

• Incorrect usage or your and you’re. (Your=belonging to, You're=You Are) Got it? Good.
• Incorrect use of Fewer and Less, especially by supermarkets to appeal to 'the man in the street'. It's wrong and it's patronising.
• Punctuation and incorrect usage of apostrophes. (mainly Its It's CD's and all the other grocer's grocers' variations)
• Drivers that use mobiles. Bad drivers. Selfish drivers. Yes, I ride a bike, I have kids. I'm sensitive to this type of thing. If you have children, or even if you don't, you should know better and try and be a better person.
• Overcooked things. Overcooked meat, particularly beef. Overcooked fish, non in particular. Overcooked pasta. Overcooked vegetables.
• Meals that have disproportionate amounts of carbohydrate; e.g. Lasagne and chips – just wrong nutritionally, and culturally.
• Downhill segments on Strava, or people that go out on a really really short ride with the sole intention of 'achieving' against a Strava segment. What are you trying to prove, and who are you trying to impress?
• Smartphone video that is shot in portrait format – ridiculous. Until manufacturers make portrait TVs, just shoot it landscape as it should be. Yes I know 'it's only going on Facebook' but that just makes for a smaller video. And even content on Facebook should have some sort of quality consideration. Actually, do what you like on Facebook – it doesn't matter.
• Tea that is brewed in a cup with milk – it must be added after (or milk in the cup first if brewed in a pot). And don't get me started on bad coffee.
• Requesting me to do something by saying ‘Do you think…?’ Just ask. The answer is still no.
• Gratuitous ‘Twanking’ on Twitter. (Twitter Self-Thanking. Quoting Tweets of others that are complimentary towards you, for all to see. Not any other desciption contained in the Urban Dictionary)
• The proliferation of meaningless self-congratulatory industry award ceremonies. We should have less fewer, but better quality. Or they mean nothing.
• Badly run pitch processes.

OK, so most of this doesn't matter much (apart from the mobile use while driving), and some of it you won't be able to do much about.

(attempts to bring this post slightly on topic)

If you do want to do something to cheer me up, and many others within this industries of ours, try to get better at running pitches. It can be daunting. The good news is, help is at hand thanks to the IPA and ISBA, in the way of The Good Pitch: Best practice for clients & agencies.

At the core of these guidelines are six principles:

1. Openness & Transparency
2. Respect
3. Bravery
4. Access & Navigation
5. Timing
6. Power of Collective Action

Who knows, you might even end up with a more satisfying outcome, delivering more value for your organisation, and have more enjoyment throughout the process.

Note: If I were to be asked what my 'likes' are I'd have just as much to say. Because I'm a well balanced type of guy.

Feel free to comment and share your own pet hates or tips and suggestions for what makes a rewarding pitch process.